Saturday, 08 November 2008
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Healthkicker: How do You Get Others to Eat and Live a Healthy Lifestyle?
Healthkicker
A concerned Healthkicker reader asked if there was a way to get across to people who are anorexic?
What can you say or do to help an anorexic understand they are hurting themselves by not living a healthy lifestyle?
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Comments (17)
I dont think you CAN get them to understand unless they want to. Anorexia is a serious mental disorder and it doesnt mean "just eating" or anything like that. Its a long hard battle for many girls.
I am super curious as to everyone's responses. I wasn't a "hard core" anorexic. But I did deal with anorexia/bulimia for a while. What got through to me was reading a post on xanga about a girl recovering from it, describing in detail what it had done to her body and what she was going through. Also one of the main factors is because I'm a christian and I realized one day as I was crying on the couch, weak and shaking, that this wasn't how a christian woman should be acting. Doesn't mean though I quickly got over it and haven't dealt with it since though. I haven't even tried to purge in a month (yay me!) and my eating has been regular.
AND i stayed away from the pro-ana sites.
You should leave them alone? Once they are aware of what they are doing to themselfs it becomes a choice... You can't force recovery on anyone it doesn't work that way...
Not everyone who is unhealthy is anorexic... Why not ask an intelligent question and ask "What could done to help someone who is struggling with an eating disorder?" Anorexia isn't the only eating disorder and not everyone with disordered eating has an actual eating disorder and not everyone with one is underweight... Theres many eating disorders out there, even binge eating and compulsive over eating disorder... You wouldn't say to someone who eats too much "Wow, you eat wayy too much" weather it's unhealthy or not... Also there is eating disorders that we are in denial about such as orthorexia... How could being health obsessed these days when everyone cares be an eating disorder??
I'm not pro-ed, I'm pro-choice... I'm pro-education on the subject too...
So, I'll stick with my origional response of leave them alone...
You can't make them understand unless they want to.
my best friend in anorexic. Saying things to her about it upsets her a lot, so, instead of saying anything, I simply invite her over from time to time and since my family is very Old World, she knows that she has to stay to eat at least one meal. My family LOVES big meals so it's a little hard for her, but, just by making the environment relaxed and fun, she is comfortable to get a plate a food - even if it is a small one. :)
I would refer a person who deals with anorexia to a good therapist.
I dont think it is our business to get involved in someone else's lifestyle.
They have to realize it for themselves...no one can do it for them.
i wish i could take all these comments and apply it to the post also on healthkicker bashing anoretics and bulimics. it's good to see that some people understand that it's not just a phase for everyone and that it's a serious condition no amount of taunting will fix.
I don't know anyone who is bulimic or anorexic. I am baffled that these are categoried as mental disorders. Are there medications to treat this disorder? Or some chemical imbalance in the brain to be qualified to be labeled under mental disorder? Hmm...
If I do come across someone who is a victim to the forementioned, I will not hesitate to try to help them out of it. At least, as a decent human being my conscience is clear. I did my best and the rest is up to them.
I think this not only applies to those who are suffering from bulimia or aneroxia but people who are over weight too. Come to think about it, are most overweight people considered as suffering some form of eating disorders? o.0?
Anorexics already know that what they are doing. You don't need to get them to 'understand'. Anorexia is far more complex than you can ever imagine. It's not just about food; It's a psychological battle usually combined with other types of mental disorders- not eating is merely the outcome or an outlet for it.
@Tomato_Salsa@xanga - Eating disorders are so much more mental than they are physical.. Like most people don't realize that bulimics usually maintain a normal weight or that someone can have orthorexia from being way too health obsessed... And no their is no pill or cure to an eating disorder, therpy and corrected eating on their part plus the willingness to change is what recovery is all about... That's why when it comes to helping them they have to help themselfs...
I believe pro-ana sites and things like that should somehow be controlled. There is nothing healthy about being anorexic. No matter how many times I tried to explain it to my friend, 1] she never believed she was sick and 2] she didn't give a shit she could die. When she lived with me, I always watched her eat. If she said she was full, I never believed her. We always ate at least one meal a day. I'm pretty positive that's all she ate. I haven't talked to her in a while, but I'd be interested to she how she is doing. I doubt she is doing any better. It's all in her head and at the end of the day, she has to be the one who wants to chance.
@purifyingpurge@xanga - I don't have an eating disorder, but I do extreme diet, and it is taking a toll on my health... My period has even been irregular as a result... BUT... Even if everyone in my life told me how much they loved and supported me I wouldn't care and it would have no effect... I still wouldn't eat around people, I would want all the same things I always have...
I get anal when people mention it to me, I'm fully aware...
1)Eating disorders have been linked to more recognizable mental disorders, such as OCD and depression, for which there are medications and links to chemical imbalances. Therefore it stands to reason that they are mental disorders in their own right. It's the same as something like trichotillomania(compulsively pulling out your own hair) which has been linked to ocd.
2)Medication is not proof of a mental disorder. The urge to medicate ourselves with chemical compounds is not an innate one. Mental disorders, on the other hand, could be argued as being innate. And so the two should not be forced to go hand in hand. Many doctors, when treating people with ocd etc, prefer to take the non medicating route if possible, focusing on things like cbt(cognitive beavioural therapy) to actually doling out the meds.
3)Eating disorders also have hereditary links (true or false I think is still debated. Again, it stands to reason that if something is passing down the bloodline there is a chance that it is related to the 'blood' or genes.
4)"Mental disorder or mental illness is a psychological or behavioral pattern that occurs in an individual and is thought to cause distress or disability that is not expected as part of normal development or culture."...sounds about right to me
This isn't any kind of attack by the way, but you said you were baffled so I thought I'd give you my 2 cents.
And in answer to the actual question, don't rush in if you aren't all that close to the person, it's a tricky issue and you need to be someone they trust. I would say just let them know they can talk to you without fear of judgement(don't say this if you're actually going to judge them)and that if they need some help, you'll be there for them. And maybe hug them a bit. Yeah, like some people have said, you can't force somebody to get better, but likewise sometimes people do want to fix themselves they just don't know how. I'm struggling with helping myself by myself, I recently blogged about how it's occured to me that I don't know how to eat properly, like when I was little someone else fed me and when I got older I just abused my body and now I just don't know where to start or how I'm meant to eat or when I should eat or whether I should be this hungry before I eat or whether I should feel this full after I'm done or whether I'm getting these cravings because I'm messed up or because I haven't eaten enough or whether my body should look like it does or whether anything I do or eat at any time is right. Lol sorry to spiral downwards there, I'm just trying to point out where help might be needed. Hope you and the other person are ok.xx