Tuesday, 04 August 2009
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She Thinks Purging Is Okay
I get impossibly frustrated with one of my closest friends because she's dabbled in using several unhealthy/illegal substances, but the latest thing I've learned about her frustrates me the most. She recently told me that she had purposely vomited after eating a large amount of food one night and after some criticism and talk about bulimia, told me that she purged after eating a lot of food only "once in a while," which she said wasn't going to harm her.
She claims that she knows when her throat isn't in good enough condition to purge and that she doesn't allow herself to vomit during that time. She thinks that it isn't a habit, but an occasional way of getting a binge out of her system. I'm somewhat certain that she doesn't purge more than 2-3 times a month since I live with her, but if she really only purges once every couple months, I don't know how to convince her that it's not okay, even if normal people can get sick and vomit every few months. I've tried the "this is the beginnings of bulimia" approach, but she firmly believes that she has complete control over herself.
Help! I don't know what to say to her anymore.
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Comments (68)
google the effects of bulimia on google and show her the after math of her bad behavior
tell her it's far better to exercise it off because A. it burns the calories without really harming your body and B. It builds muscle that burn even more calories and allow her to eat a little more without worry.
That is ridiculous. I know from personal experience that it can lead to the real deal quicker than one would expect. Chances are she knows what she's doing is wrong and knows what she's getting into but is denial about it. If she's using illegal substances as well, she probably won't be keen to admit to anything.
I would just keep an eye on her. If things appear to get worse, say something. Casually say things that make eating disorders sound like the wrong way to go about things (without sounding judgemental or accusing).
Worst comes to worst, say you really care about her and you don't want her to end up doing something so dangerous. You can seriously injure yourself from purging once. It can even lead to death. It doesn't matter how often she does it. It's not the same as throwing up when you're sick.
Just keep at it in as non-nagging a way as possible.
Best of luck and I hope she stops her behavior soon.
You need to go at this head on. Like the first commenter said, look up the effects of bulimia and the negative repercussions of it. Tell her, show her.
oh dear
I'm thinking that you need to show her ALL the horrible effects of purging, and try to get her to just work out and exercise rather than vomit. If she doesn't want to do it by herself, get a workout buddy (or you be the work out buddy).
I don't hink anyone will be truly happy in the future, and there is possible harm. Her actions might make her happy for that moment, but really, why bother such risks?
Yeah, you need to be firm and serious with your roommate. Show her the effects of doing this disgusting madness, then encourage her to get help, because she's on the way to bulimia. If she doesn't change, either she becomes homeless or you move out.
I do the same a her.
I think its ok once in a while if ive eatin to much. It just makes me feel better.
Id say let her do what she wants.
I'm the same way, if its under control it's okay.
if it's not constant just occasional its just controlling whats going on with
your body and eating. i dunno
I used to purge and I stopped when my body would start bringing up the food automatically. But I still purge on occassion. Last time I did it I felt sick like indegestion for about 2-3 days so finally I was like i'm going to puke and you know what after i puked and showered I felt 100% better. That was like 6 months ago, and you know what if 2morrow i started feeling that again and it didn't go away I would do it again. And yes I do have control of it. And I had mental control over it b4. when my body started to take over I put a quick end to it!
i doubt showing her will help. if she cared what it did to her, she wouldnt be doing it in the first place. it doesnt take a genius to figure out that its bad for you. if i were you id just let know that i was there for her if she needed anything and let her figure it out on her own. theres not really much else you can do.
Does she know that purging actually doesn't work? Your body absorbs these calories basically instantly.
And she has an eating disorder; she needs to see a therapist.
@BunnyParfait@xanga - That's not correct. If that was the case than all those women who binge then purge would be HUGE. But they aren't. When you purge with in a certain time after eating your body does not absorb all the calories, only a fraction. And when you consume 3k calories a fraction of that is better than the entire thing.
As far as her having an eating disorder who knows, theres not enough information. Theres a difference between having an eating disorder and disordered eating. Purging 2-3times per months does not qualify you for an "eating disorder". Feel free to google Bulimia.
So I just looked further into the caloric consumption when you eat. Food stays in your stomach for about 1-4 hrs and you don't absorb calories or nutrients until it moves to your small intestines. That coincides with why bulimics tend to be mal-nutritioned. If cals/nutrients were still absorbed than they would be healthy with bad esophagus's
@XxAineBxX@xanga - If she does what she wants, she'll end up hurting herself way more than if someone stopped her and showed her the horrible effects of it.
I agree with what the first few comments said. Google the effects and longterm effects of this and how it to her. If that doesn't open her eyes, then I don't know what will.
@PrinsesAna@xanga - That is actually very much so correct. Basically your body absorbs 80% of what you eat by the time you get to the bathroom. The reason you're not huge is because you're not eating a lot to begin with.
Feel free to learn more when you become an Abnormal Psych minor like myself. =]
(that means go to college before pretending like you know anything).
@BunnyParfait@xanga - I have been diagnosed with bulimia and I disagree: if my body absorbed 80% of what I'd eaten then I'm sure I would be quite large. And I am eating a lot to begin with. I think that over 2000 calories in one sitting plus normal meals is quite a bit. I have gone to college and am considering minoring in psych. I've already taken two classes in psychology and have done a lot of independent research on the subject of eating disorders. To meet the DSM-IV criteria for bulimia you must binge/purge at least twice a week for at least three months. From the information given, she does not have an eating disorder - she has disordered eating.
@just__one__me@xanga - One of the main reasons why it's harder to tell if someone has bulimia is because the weight loss isn't nearly as significant as someone with anorexia. I know plenty of bulimics that are indeed average or overweight. Weighing 50 lbs isn't the determining factor for bulimia either. Educate yourself please.
And no one really knows what she has. Disordered eating or an eating disorder. If she does have an eating disorder she's showing peculiar attitude towards it: bulimics tend to be ashamed of their actions.
@BunnyParfait@xanga - Oh, I know that you can be overweight and have bulimia. What I meant to say is that if my body absorbed all the calories, then I would be gaining weight instead of maintaining. At my weight, it is very difficult to eat over 3500 calories per day and not gain weight when my BMR is only around 1400 and I don't exercise that often.
I consider myself very educated on the subject of eating disorders, especially bulimia. Please don't insult me.
@just__one__me@xanga - "What I meant to say is that if my body absorbed all the calories, then I would be gaining weight instead of maintaining."
Not necessarily; there's more to your weight than just your calorie intake. It also depends on your metabolism, your digestive system, the types of food you eat, etc.
"I consider myself very educated on the subject of eating disorders, especially bulimia. Please don't insult me."
Don't insult ME by thinking you know better than me when you don't even know me. I suffered from anorexia and while I was not diagnosed with bulimia I purged. And when I sought out help both my psychologist and my regular doctor AND my nutritionist explained to me that the habits do not actually help you lose weight because you absorb the calories upon intake.
I think I trust them more than snotty teens. =]
@BunnyParfait@xanga - Please, I don't want this to get any nastier than it's already become. Just because you're over 20 doesn't mean that you are more mature/knowledgeable than some "snotty teen" like myself. I will be 20 next year, does that make me any better than I am now? I do trust nutritionists and psychologists, but from what my psychologist told me, about half of the food that you ingest gets regurgitated when you purge.
I honestly do believe that I know better than you when it comes to eating disorders judging by the fallacious information you have presented. I'm not trying to attack you, rather I'm trying to correct some false "facts."
@just__one__me@xanga - Your ignorance is not my problem. Nor do you know anything about my past. It's cute how you try to put yourself above me when you're so far below. Have a nice night kid. =]
@BunnyParfait@xanga - I am not ignorant on the subject of eating disorders. You do not know anything about me or my past, so how can you get away with judging me? I'm trying my best not to be sarcastic and hurtful in my comments, but you aren't returning the favor. I haven't belittled or insulted you, yet you insist on degrading me.
@just__one__me@xanga - Who is judging you? Degrading you? LOL Please, I'm the wrong person to try to pity party or try to pretend like you're so butt hurt about my spouting reality in your direction. Clearly you're at a standstill; you're trying so hard to say you know more than someone else but you're failing. And then you get butt hurt the second someone does it to you.
Get the fuck out lmao.
@BunnyParfait@xanga - I apologize if I offended you in any way. I actually am feeling hurt because of your comments. I don't consider them reality though, so I suppose I shouldn't get too upset. I think I'd like to be done talking with you now, we're really not getting anywhere useful. I'm sorry our conversation wasn't more pleasant.
if i had the talent to make myself throw up, i would probably be like that. i would think that i'd have control too..