Through the last three years, winter has always been a rough time emotionally for me. It's not just the cold season itself, but the events that so ironically happen to fall within the same calender month of December. I deal with it quite well though, so I decided to share.
Ten Effective Ways to Deal With Hurt, Pain and Depression:
1) Music. I know this may seem counter-productive, but listening to songs that you can relate to your situation really helps. I find it calms me and instead of me having to think, the music thinks for me. This sounds completely weird, but music is my favourite form of therapy. I purposely listen to songs that temporarily depress me, because after I feel content and emotionless.
2) Actively NOT thinking about it. When ever an unwelcome thought comes into my mind, I consciously tell myself not to acknowledge it. This is what I find to be the best defense when in public, with family or at school. It's surprising how much of a distraction it is when you're literally making yourself not think about something.
3) Over-analyzing. The opposite of ignoring thinking about the situation, it's really effective to simply talk about every little detail. The more you repeat it, the less it hurts. Perhaps this is only a method that someone as left brained as myself can find relief in, yet I completely analyze all the existent and nonexistent logic until it becomes more of a puzzle than a pain.
4) Reading. Again, this may be more relevant to me than others, but I find a novel to be the greatest form of escape. For however long I pour over the words, my life disappears. I am no longer a teenage girl struggling to deal with my fucked up life, I am not real. Ever since I was young, reading has been my way to stay sane and avoid having to be myself for a few hours.
5) Avoiding self-pity. Point blank. Don't blame yourself, that only makes it worse.
6) Caffeine. It's legal and it's relatively safe. The hyper feeling and pulsation through your body when you have a certain amount is amazing. It makes you feel alive, without the self injury others use to feel.
7) Allow yourself to be angry. Scream. Shout. Kick things. It honestly helps to wear yourself out in rage, then fall back into a calm state.
8) Blog it. I find putting my feelings into words to be a good way to sort through my mind. I often start with no idea what I want to say, then allow myself to freely type everything in my mind. Then, I can look back through what I've written and can figure out what I'm thinking.
9) Clean. Organizing things could be like a metaphor for cleaning up my life. Either way, alphabetizing DVDs and sorting clothes gives me a feeling of purpose and of distraction.
10) Get distracted with friends. Self-explanatory :)
What are some ways you get out of a funk? How do you deal with depression?
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Comments (57)
Music is definitely the number one thing I use. Books and blogging come in second, although blogging has kind of fallen to the way side lately. And sometimes, definitely, just talking the situation to death can help (although sometimes it backfires, and instead of talking it into submission, it comes back and makes me think it's this unmovable terrible obstacle I'll never get past).
I agree completely with the reading one. It helps alot.
OHHH I HEARD ABOUT NUMBER 9! I ALWAYS FELT BETTER AFTER CLEANING AND I NEVER MADE THE CONNECTION UNTIL SOMEONE TOLD ME ABOUT IT!
MUSIC DOES HELP! I ALWAYS LISTEN TO PAPA ROACH LAST RESORT WHEN I'M MAD... AND WHEN I'M MAD I GET ANGRY AND GET THE AGGRESSION OUT BY BOXING IT WORKS! I ALWAYS FEEL BETTER AFTERWARDS!
cleaning is quite therapeutic
I'll have to give these a try, i really hope it works
You forgot EXERCISE. Exercise releases endorphines and is as effective as many leading anti-depressants. To quote comedian bill maher "ask your doctor if getting off your ass is right for you".
My mom wants me to take medicine to help my depression, but I want to deal with it naturally without chemicals messing with my head. Thanks for the advice <3 I never thought about caffeine. And I love cleaning to distract myself from things.
@wintergirl22@xanga - Caffeine isn't the best idea. Like any high, you come down eventually, and end up feeling worse than you did before.
Hm. Are we talking about ways to deal with it without like using therapists and psychiatrists and medication? Maybe more natural ways?
How about alcohol? Nothing better than getting so tipsy you forgot what you depressed about! All natural too! Seriously. I mean, all you have to do is put apple juice in your fridge for like a year and voila! Your own wine! Yum!
Seriously folks... If you're depressed/suicidal... Music and NOT THINKING ABOUT IT are not going to solve any problems... Trust me on this... I've been to the hospital and back a few times... Go see a fucking doctor.
@ironic_vertigo@xanga - My original post never mentioned depression.
http://breaking-expectations.xanga.com/718519968/instead-of-killing-myself/
It was about stress and hurt, more accurately heartbreak.
Great list and I enjoyed reading your viewpoints on these.
I think that talking about what's bothering you with people sometimes instead of hiding it always can help as well. People can't always give you solutions to your anxieties, but the fact that someone is listening will make you feel better, and sometimes it also helps to put things in perspective when you talk it out. For me, money and the future make me worry a lot--to the point where any time I am left to my own devices I begin to panic about it. But talking with other people about it helps me realize that there is more to life than one's finances and career.
Once in awhile, you hit the jackpot and you'll end up talking about it with someone who's going through the same thing or been through it in the past, and then you can get some really useful information to help you out.
@agnophilo@xanga - Yes. Exercise is probably the one thing that helps me the most.
@methodElevated@xanga - : D It's a classic. FAR better than drinking, self-mutilation, religion etc, which create problems of their own.
@wintergirl22@xanga - Read my other comment, you might find it useful : D
@agnophilo@xanga - that's a good idea. I'll to get a gym membership, cause it's too cold outside to exercise, like go for a run outside. thanks!
escape by going online into a world away from the world
read entertainment sites, browse shopping sites, listen to music, watch dvds, play pc games, chat on instant messenger, etc. basically, procrastination is how I deal with depression.
@wintergirl22@xanga - : D
I also enjoy listening to sad music about what I'm going through, like heartbreak or loss or pain. If it's good music, that is. Because if someone can feel intense pain or sadness and be able to create something beautiful, then that sadness is beautiful. And if you can appreciate that beauty because of what you've gone through, then your own pain contributed to that beauty.
That makes it seem not so bad to me.
Music (listening to, playing, and singing), writing (poetry and songs), exercise, golf, venting. Just a few of the things I try to do. That said, my depression is in like the 95th percentile of all known cases, and no matter how "good" I feel, I always feel like utter complete shit.
It sucks.
Wonderful post!! These all are things I use myself, except for the caffeine.
When a person is going through a really deep depression, one thing that can happen at really low levels is that they want to kill themselves, but don't have enough motivation to. This is why the first few days and weeks of any new anti-depressant are so dangerous; the anti-depressant gives them more energy (and more motivation) that when not partnered with good counseling or some other way to relieve the depression can lead to suicide. Caffeine may have the same unintended results. Just be careful with that!!
@agnophilo@xanga - Absolutely! I think exercise can be the best thing you can do for yourself in general, especially when depressed. The endorphins can give a person a certain high that cannot be experienced any other way. Love it!!
@ironic_vertigo@xanga - Alcohol is a depressant. It can make you feel good for the time that you're drunk, but even if a person isn't depressed before drinking after a few nights of alcohol they may very well feel worse than they did before. And not everyone needs to go see a doctor. I was honestly planning suicide only a week or so ago but found better ways of taking out my sadness... These things may all work for you but from what I've seen it's not for everyone - some need a doctor's attention, some need music. It's just about who you are.
That's nice so how does one motivate oneself to do any of this if they can't even bring themselves to get out of bed?
i allow myself the occassional day to lock myself in my room (away from heights, water, cars, and other dangerous things) and mope. and then get up the next day and start counting down until my next wallowing, moping day.
i have always found that when you are at that crisis point and you want to die, the best thing to do is to go to bed - to promise yourself overnight/during the day/whenever it is you sleep to relax and let your mind work. until a friend of mine committed suicide - after that i promised never to try again.
@Didra@xanga - you could still put music on, and blog, and read. Putting music on is the easiest - you can just let it go while you rest. and you can set yourself goals for each day. even a small goal, like, um, opening up the curtains and letting sunlight in for a little bit, or fixing something healthy to eat.
@ironic_vertigo@xanga - alcohol is a depressant. you feel fine for a little while, but worse afterwards. you make a good point with therapy though - there are heaps of different kinds of therapy that work very well for depression.
Music has always been the number one for my depression. It's amazing how one song can just change your outlook for an entire day, and make it a happy one.
i am very glad this was posted.
my friend killed herself four years ago, and i wish that others could see there are different ways out of it.i've been extremely depressed, i still am, and i've attempted suicide an incredible amount of times.i listen to music, talk to friends, or scribble really really hard onto a piece of paper what I am thinking.Those things help but not always. If someone is truly depressed, they should get help.
Your original post mentions depression in the title.