Friday, 07 October 2011
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Struggling With Depression
Dear friends,I know you know I struggle with depression. I know you are often confused and frustrated by it. I know you love me.
What I don’t think you know is how much I love your patience.
People who don’t have a background with mental illness can have a hard time dealing with a friend who struggles. They can’t understand why they can’t just turn things around, quit the negative thinking, stop their crying, and just be okay. They become frustrated.
But you, my friends, have always taken great patience and care when I’m down. When I’m calling because I can’t be alone with what I’m thinking, with what I’m feeling.
And you do get frustrated. You tell me. You say you don’t know what to say, that you wish it could change, that you just want me to be happy.
But the important thing is you stay with me. You get frustrated but you stay. And you are patient. You are patient with your frustration, with my frustration, with the whole mess.
And I love you for it. So I wanted to take a moment and thank you, from the bottom of my troubled heart, thank you for always trying.
As someone with a mental illness, on behalf of all who struggle, thank you. Thank you for staying.
Sincerely,
Funnygirlblues
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About the Author
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- From: funnygirlblues
- About Me: I am a 6'1" girl trying to put my life together in New York City. I love to write, read, cafe hop, and swim when I have the chance. I believe good health has its foundations in good mental health, and do my best to keep that in order as well. Everything's a work in progress.
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Comments (10)
I can relate to this so well.
Very few are patient with me, but those who are, I just really appreciate from the bottom of my heart.
My whole battle through my mental illness and finding out eventually that I had schizophrenia I only had TWO friends who stuck by me. Not 24/7, I barely even see them. But outside of my family, two people stuck with me. I can name off 30 people I considered friends in high school and college before I got sick and none of them stuck around. Even the ones who had diagnosable mental illnesses themselves.
@FallingSafely@xanga - And that's the curse of mental illness. I've had friends drop me like a hot potato and some that degraded me because I was bipolar. I know that feeling. I only have a few true friends left.
Thanks for this post. I have clinical depression and ADD, and it sucked, trying to fix myself by myself. I didn't have a lot of my friends' numbers at the time and everyone who did reach out to me would laugh at the funny parts of what I was going through, then just offer me advice to fix the fucked up parts, which made me feel like they didn't entirely understand.
It's hard to get out of depression until you set your priorities straight and set some goals. It's not worth the time to be in that state. One has to realize also when to let go and forget, forgive, and think about how to improve things. If staying in one place sucks, then leave. New place, new time, new beginning.
Thank you for this post.
lovely post. i was diagnosed with bipolar last year, and an eating disorder years before that... i had an amazing group of friends before my illness, and now? now, i have a spare few.
honestly, it doesn't bother me, not like i thought it would. i keep to myself these days, and i like it that way. support systems are important, and i lean as heavily as i can on my family for that. but really, i've just learned to rely on myself. i like it best that way.
again, thank you for this.
I suffer with depression due to a lot of things that have gone wrong in my life, the lack of support systems, no family or real friends...it's hard. No one stays with me, no one shows patience and no one really cares and I know I am not a bad person...no one sticks around though. So...I go through it all alone and deal with it the best way I know how until I break down and have to seek out professional help...end of story. But, I know too well how it is to battle with depression periodically. Every one needs external support systems outside of spiritual and religious foundations. Everyone needs an actual physical being to give you a hug, talk you through what you are going through, hold you and give you consolement and just be there. If I had any of this...things wouldn't be so hard all the time and I wouldn't feel so desolate.
@DrTryHarder@xanga - It's not always that easy...especially when you have no one. No matter how many times you move, or how many goals you set and try to accomplish, without someone who really cares and is there when you 'need' them to be the progress is ever so slow...